December, 2010 browsing by month


Game Day Report – 12 / 5

Sunday, December 5th, 2010






The mighty Clausen The Mighty Stanton

Some days smell of war. You don’t so much wake up on a day where Jimmy Clausen faces Drew Stanton as much as your willed out of bed by the still alive spirit of 1,000 long dead Visigoths screaming for vengeance. Men would be hewn through stench and fire on this Sunday.

It began on Thursday actually. My adversary had wisely pulled the trigger on the Houston Texans defense, and they did not disappoint. While having one INT, they generally mailed it in and let Philly put up 34 on them. Going into Sunday, he’s up by a healthy -3.00 already. And has the mighty Drew Stanton waiting at the gate. Could I compete with this juggernaut?

Armed with Detroit’s defense and the mighty Clausen, Sunday arrived. Clausen was strong (weak) and kept his eyes on the prize (kept his eyes off the prize) and delivered: No TDs, an INT, and a fumble. A solid -1.80 performance. However, Detroit was a bit stronger than they should have been and netted me 6 points. It was up to Drew. And, oh dear, did he not suck at all. 2 TDs, no turnovers and almost 200 yards. And against the supposedly vaunted Chicago defense. Thanks to his 19.20 outing, the dead Visigoths scream a new name tonight. Mine. (Nice)

Pain week – 12/1

Wednesday, December 1st, 2010

This is rough. There is an obvious play this week if you haven’t already called it, Derek Anderson. He’s on an epically terrible team and just had a meltdown on live TV that Jim Mora thought was inappropriate. However, this could go one of two ways. Let’s not forget this guy was a pro bowler in 2007 and threw 29 TDS, and can have flashes of brilliance occasionally. So I will warn, start him at your own risk, he’s majorly pissed off and that can result in greatness or more suck, we’ll see. But I’m taking him out of consideration this week. Guys I’m considering, somewhat to maybe to not at all:

Chad Henne: Betting on Cleveland’s defense to bring you a fantasy victory is as dumb as the day is long. No.

Drew Stanton: If indeed Shawn Hill can’t go, this is the best play of the week. However, my adversary has already grabbed him.

Jason Campbell: Also schizophrenic play, could throw 3TDs, could throw 75 INTs. No.

Peyton Manning: Excuse me? Did I just trigger some kind of upside down reverse mortgage fantasy karma by even suggesting that? Look, he’s one of the greatest ever, but the team is literally decimated. He threw 4 picks last week. However, he’s still Manning and threw 2 TDs and always has a mess of yards. It’s the “he’s still Manning” part that would terrify me, so if you’re an idiot or have balls or you’re a balsy idiot, have a go at this one. Also, it’s Dallas’ D, but they have been doing better recently. So perhaps against this shell of a Colts team. No.

John Kitna: No way.

Jimmy Clausen: I’m probably staying with him, but he looks a little less shitty each week and I’m starting to sweat.

Defensively, going with the Lions again. Culter seems to be good Jay Culter as of late and he should be able to put up 30 or so on this crew.

On a serious note, it’s no secret that I love the Monday Night Football announcers. However in this case I think that John Gruden acted like a giant douchebag for focusing on Derek Anderson blowing off some steam and having a moment of levity with his teammate. The guy had a bad day at work and he’s laughing with his teammate, more than likely wondering how it could get worse and making light of it. What’s he supposed to do, Chuckie, sit on the sideline flagellating himself with a leather whip like some dark age monk? He’s what Suckelague is all about, not taking our successes or failures too seriously. I think he’s getting a really raw deal here and hope he bounces back against St Loius. If you think he had no right to laugh that performance off, you really need to check yourself.