I have so much Alex Smith wood right now

Written by SLAdmin on October 18th, 2012

So I am a male, human mammal. Let’s just get that out of the way. As I sit here watching San Fran vs Seattle, some of the camera angles they put on the 49er’s cheerleaders have that primal human part of me reasoning “Why on earth have we not signed over our entire life savings to one of those women so we can have the privilege of sucking on her legs?” Wait, what? Look, I never claimed being a male human mammal was easy or made sense on any level. And I suppose I’m fortunate some part of my un-primal self thinks that’s an incredibly horrible idea. Well, to some extent. Look, I can make more money, can’t I? So, can’t she have what I’ve made up to this point because I’D REALLY ENJOY LICKING HER HAIR. Wow, what? Man, mammals are fucked up, especially the male ones.

So I won this odd week, a week in which the Oakland Raiders defense achieved 3 interceptions and Ryan Tannehill threw 2 touchdowns (None of that was a typo). Week 6 didn’t go right for either the adversary or myself, save Brady Quinn who was really quite rancid. Cutting ties with Brandon Weeden was smart, and was the main reason for my victory (victory). I am not GM on any level, but I do sense the adversary is trying to save Oldsmobile at this point (see the last 2 posts) with Ryan Tannehill, and he needs to snap out of it.

But let’s get back to real reason for this post. Alex Smith, the first Suckleague hall of fame inductee for his 2005 performance, is as of now kicking ass once again in 2012, and I couldn’t be happier. Alex Smith, YOU ARE SUCKLEAGUE. Stink up the joint your first few years then evolve and kick all the ass there is. My baby keeps growing up and OH MAN IS HIS WIFE HOT AND I WANT TO

Wow sorry. This mammal bullshit is hard to cope with sometimes.

AlexSmithWife

– J

 

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