North Korean supreme leader Kim Jong Un has gone public with his apparent shunning from Sunday’s Bills / Falcons match-up in Toronto, while embattled city mayor Rob Ford was freely allowed to attend.
Jong Un said when interviewed, “Look filthy westerner, what does a dignitary need to do to get some love? That crack smoking chauvinist gets to sit on the 50 while I’m stuck watching WNBA reruns on a pirated cable hookup.”
Ford has admitted to smoking crack and driving drunk and is also under allegations of verbal and physical abuse from his former staff. He recently denied new allegations from a female staffer claiming he sought to perform oral sex with graphic language of his own, stunning the reporters who surrounded him: “It says I wanted to eat her pussy and I have never said that in my life to her. I would never do that. I’m happily married and I’ve got more than enough to eat at home.”
“He said what?”, Jong Un said in reacting to Ford’s latest PR nightmare, now visibly angry, “Look I may be the brutal monarch of a hereditary dictatorship, but I would never say ‘pussy’ to a reporter. Oh and I’ll pee in a cup right now, crack free here. Write it down. I mean it, write it down or I’ll have you publicly executed.”
When asked if he thought the mayor’s attendance hurt Buffalo’s chance to win, Jong Un replied “No, the Bills suck.”